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College amateur swinger for Older Woman Housewives looking casual sex Mecca Indiana Your MOM will hate me! Jesus Christ! Every God damn ad posted here seeks a loyal, honest, dependable, blah, blah, blah.......man.

And therein lies the problem: You want a MAN that isn't. You want a doormat pansy ass eunuch. Men need to be men.

Honestly, I'm a complete fucking asshole. I lie, cheat, drink all night, sleep with more women than is reasonable or advisable, wake up in ditches next to people I don't know, drive stinking drunk, get arrested, crash my motorcycle, always date women half my age, steal petty items just for the fun of it, laugh at retards, act like an imbecile, make inappropriate comments at inopportune times, your mom will hate me, dad will loath me, and at some point I'll probably be deported. Unless you exhaust me, I will not be there in the morning (or at least too many mornings in a row).

OK, I think that sums up yesterday.

On the upside, I'm moderately handsome, charming, very personable, boyish, interesting, well educated, active, fit, well-read, and I've traveled extensively. I can sell ice to Eskimos (Please note that I did not use the PC term Inuit. Why? Because they're fucking Eskimos, that's why!). I have to be all these things to get away with being such a goddamn asshole.

What I want: A woman that will meet me for drinks, drink more than is reasonable or advised, enjoy herself without a care for what everyone else in the damn bar thinks, dance on the table, make asses of ourselves, and end up naked on the mall making love till the cops come and chase our naked asses away. Then, finish making love at your place and wake up exhausted, drenched in sweat, smelling of sex and damn fine tequila.

I'm not looking for a one-night stand, just someone that will keep up with me. And yes, I have a wife AND a girlfriend.

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